EPISODE 2: Don’t Touch the Camera Crew
INT. HIGH SCHOOL HALLWAY – AFTERNOON (1)
CHISAKI is standing over SHINICHI TEMPEST with the camera visible in the background.
CHISAKI:
“Take off if you know what’s good for ya.”
EXT. SIDEWALK/STREET – AFTERNOON (2)
CHISAKI storms out of the school. He’s walking down a busy street with his hands in his pockets. He reaches an intersection and waits impatiently to cross. He bounces in place. His antsy movements imply that he might cross before the pedestrian light signals. Luckily, the light flashes and he’s able to cross. He’s deep in thought, staring down at his feet as he walks.
INT. CAR/NEARBY DRIVER – AFTERNOON (3)
A random driver is turning into the intersection while they’re scrolling through their playlist. When they look back up they are about to collide with another car. They swerve and have now lost control of the vehicle. The car swerves towards CHISAKI.
BLACK SCREEN
Sounds of a car crash can be heard.
INTRO PLAYS THAT’S FULL OF SPOILERS AND DESPONDENT EDGY PROFILE SHOTS OF THE CHARACTERS AS THEY SLOWLY LOOK FROM THE SKY TOWARDS THE CAMERA. THE SONG IS A BANGER AND HELLA SWEET.
EXT. MAIN CHARACTER ACADEMY – MORNING (4)
The school bell rings. SHINICHI TEMPEST is approaching the entrance of the academy looking nervous, glancing around.
STUDENT 2:
“Hey wannabe! You stupid or something?”
STUDENT 1:
“Maybe he thinks he’s brave.”
STUDENT 3:
“Wannabe does what wannabes always do: stick around where they don’t belong.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST INT. MONOLOGUE:
“Oh man oh man. Why did I come back? That wacko is gonna mess me up. Just be inconspicuous. AAAH why is everyone looking at me?! Run run run!”
STUDENT 3:
“Is he like never going to talk to us directly?”
INT. CLASSROOM – MORNING (5)
SHINICHI TEMPEST is sitting at his desk panting and sweaty.
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Hoo…Haa..Hooo…”
SHINICHI TEMPEST INT. MONOLOGUE:
“I can’t seem to help attracting attention to myself.”
STUDENT 2 knocks him lightly on the back of his head. He screams in fear and curls into the fetal position.
STUDENT 2:
“Wannabe. You gotta calm down. Boring is better than freak.”
SHINCHI TEMPEST:
“What is that supposed to mean?”
Only then does SHINICHI TEMPEST notice all the student’s eyeing him here and there like he is dangerous or off-putting. Lizzy walks into the classroom.
SHINICHI TEMPEST INT. MONOLOGUE:
“Thank God.”
LIZZY LION:
“I heard that. What’s wrong with you?”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Huuuh?”
LIZZY LION:
“Ok? You don’t look so good.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Still pretty freaked about yesterday.”
LIZZY LION:
“Why?”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Because I’m being bullied. I’m sorry, did I dream that or something?”
STUDENT 1:
“No.”
STUDENT 3:
“It was hilarious.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Oh man how do I get you guys off my back, eh?”
LIZZY LION:
“You haven’t read your rolecard yet, have you? After all that has happened?”
LIZZY LION is looking at SHINICHI TEMPEST with pure annoyance.
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Oh… uhh… haha. I’ll read it now.”
LIZZY LION realizes how she might have come off just now. Her facial expression and demeanor switch to her performative personality.
LIZZY LION:
“Oh, I’m so sorry Tempest-san! That response was totally not in my character type. I know! Let me make it up to you with some brownies!”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Ah no you don’t have to do that, really. You can talk to me how ever you want. I don’t mind. I can be a real pain sometimes.”
LIZZY LION:
“Actually, I can’t.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“What do you mean?”
LIZZY LION:
“Some assigned roles are a perfect fit for the student’s personality. Like yours.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Gee thanks.”
LIZZY LION:
“But then there’s roles like mine where I have to pretend to be someone else entirely. At least you don’t have to pretend to be someone you’re not.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Wait, your role isn’t you?”
LIZZY LION:
“I must be a better actor than I thought.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“What do you mean?”
LIZZY LION:
“Have you ever met someone who is this meek-mannered, stupid, and passive? To almost ridiculous extents?”
FLASHBACK BEGIN
CHISAKI is confronting SHINCHI TEMPEST and LIZZY LION in the hallway yesterday. He asks her to ditch SHINICHI TEMPEST. She doesn’t give a direct response either way. She watches as CHISAKI pummels her one friend, SHINICHI TEMPEST, in the school.
Montage plays of her giggling in the most ridiculous, girly, performative way.
SHINICHI TEMPEST has a “nosebleed” when first meeting LIZZY LION.
LIZZY LION INT. MONOLOGUE:
“I guess my character wouldn’t chokehold him, right?”
FLASHBACK END
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“I guess I haven’t met anyone like that before. But why would they have it as a role if it didn’t exist?”
LIZZY LION:
“These shows are behind the times. Women typically get typecast as weak and subservient. Only those who are particularly lucky and exceptional get better roles.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“I’ve been a huge fan of these shows my whole life. How did I miss this?”
LIZZY LION:
“You’re a guy. It’s hard to see something that doesn’t affect you if you aren’t looking for it. I’m a big girl though. I’ll do the job, and I’ll do it well. Just remember me for who I actually am, okay?”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“But I don’t know who you actually are.”
MR. NONONSENSE leaps out of nowhere and slaps SHINICHI TEMPEST across the face.
MR. NONONSENSE:
“NO TALKING DURING CLASS! I AM ABUSING MY POWER!”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“AHH! I WILL FALL IN LINE INSTEAD OF REPORTING YOU! THIS IS A COMEDIC MOMENT THAT PURPORTS PROBLEMATIC BEHAVIORS OF AUTHORITY FIGURES.”
MR. NONONSENSE:
“I SUPPOSE THIS COUNTS AS COMEDY! I WILL SUFFER NO CONSEQUENCE FROM MY ACTIONS AS LONG AS YOU AND YOUR PEERS CONTINUE TO KEEP SILENT WHICH IS MY WANT! Class has begun.”
SHINCHI TEMPEST is rubbing his cheek.
MR. NONONSENSE:
“Those of you who have been paying attention have noticed the cameras all throughout the school, yes?”
FLASHBACK BEGIN
Replay the time SHINICHI TEMPEST saw the camera in the hallway during his fight with CHISAKI. Are you tired of these flashbacks yet? Because I’m just getting started.
FLASHBACK END
All students nod.
MR. NONONSENSE:
“But have any of you noticed that you were being…followed?”
CLASS:
“UWAAA??”
MR. NONONSENSE:
“Guys, come on out.”
Secretly stationed camera men come out of their hiding spots. One was disguised as a plant. One was disguised as a window. One was disguised as the chalkboard. One was disguised as the teacher’s desk. One of them was disguised as a student.
MR. NONONSENSE:
“Meet the camera crew. They will be following you whenever it is plot relevant. They will be a signifier that something important is going to happen. But the Camera Crew won’t always be there when something important happens. In these cases, we rely on the staged cameras throughout the school.”
FLASHBACK BEGIN
Replay the time SHINICHI TEMPEST saw the camera in the hallway during his fight with CHISAKI.
FLASHBACK END
MR. NONONSENSE:
“Do NOT interact with the crew. They are not characters in your story.”
SHINCHI TEMPEST was waving at one of them and stops as told.
MR. NONONSENSE:
“Since you are all in the slice of life genre, it can be difficult to tell what counts as plot. You’ll pick up on it eventually. Remember to be familiar with your role card as there may be characters who have yet to be revealed in your arc.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST INT. MONOLOGUE:
“Oh yeah! I should probably check that now. Genre: Slice of Life. Role: Regular Guy. Friend: Lizzy Lion. Bully: Chisaki. Huh? That must be his name. But where is he today? I don’t see him in class.”
STUDENT 3:
“Get my good side. Oh, who am I kidding? With hair like this, ALL sides are my good side.”
INT. HALLWAY – AFTERNOON (6)
SHINICHI TEMPEST and LIZZY LION are standing by their lockers with camera men swarming them and all students nearby. LIZZY LION is trying very hard to act “natural” in character while SHINICHI TEMPEST is reading his role card. On the card is a character that has not been revealed. It reads Mentor: Yurei Okabe.
SHINICHI TEMPEST INT. MONOLOGUE:
“Is this a teacher in the Academy? Maybe Lizzy will know-“
LIZZY LION is shaking while forcing a cheerful smile and is whispering a monologue to the camera that nobody can understand or hear.
SHINICHI TEMPEST INT. MONOLOGUE:
“On second thought, I’ll leaver her out of it. She’s got her own problems.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Lizzy?”
LIZZY LION:
“HAHA, uh yes. Tempest-san?”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“I’m just heading to the restroom.”
LIZZY LION:
“Okay! Have a good tinkle!”
SHINICHI TEMPEST and LIZZY LION are both frozen in astonishment and embarrassment.
CUT TO
SHINICHI TEMPEST is sitting on the toilet. A white glow can be seen behind SHINICHI TEMPEST that he doesn’t notice.
CUT TO
SHINICHI TEMPEST is washing his hands. The white glowing orb is floating around SHINICHI TEMPEST who finally looks up and notices it. He’s intrigued but not freaked. It starts to grow and form into a human-like form. SHINICHI TEMPEST freaks out as he recognizes the new form as CHISAKI. The ghost moans.
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Wh-what kind of sick prank is this?”
CHISAKI:
“Hoi, asshole.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Come on out, Chisaki! I know you’re in here!”
CHISAKI:
“You’re a fraud. You don’t belong here. I’ll make SURE YOU NEVER RETURN.”
As CHISAKI says this, he alters his appearance to a morbid, grotesque, haunted version of himself. SHINICHI TEMPEST is thoroughly freaked and makes a mad dash for the door. He rushes back to where he left LIZZY LION by the lockers but she isn’t there.
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Dammit Liz, where are you?”
Ghost CHISAKI floats from out of a nearby locker and is giving chase. SHINICHI TEMPEST runs and rushes out of the entrance of the academy. He accidentally bumps into YUREI OKABE (30), a tall man dressed in an open lab coat.
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Oh, I’m so sorry, sir. I didn’t see you there! My fault completely. I’ll be more careful next time.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST is bowing over and over as he says this. The man is not paying attention to him. He’s looking over SHINICHI TEMPEST into the school, searching for something.
YUREI OKABE:
“You. Kid. What were you just running from?”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Oh, it was just a figment of my imagination. There’s nothi-“
YUREI OKABE:
“A ghost? Was it a ghost?”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Ah, how did you know? I mean, no it wasn’t. Ghosts don’t exist.”
YUREI OKABE:
“I thought as much. Get in my van, kid.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“UWA?”
Only now does SHINICHI TEMPEST notice the weird van behind YUREI OKABE.
SHINICHI TEMPEST INT. MONOLOGUE:
“There’s no camera guys around. Is this supposed to be happening?”
FLASHBACK BEGIN
MR. NONONSENSE:
“Meet the camera crew. They will be following you whenever it is plot relevant. They will be a signifier that something important is going to happen. But the Camera Crew won’t always be there when something important happens. In these cases, we rely on the staged cameras throughout the school.”
FLASHBACK END
SHINICHI TEMPEST INT. MONOLOGUE:
“That’s right. The camera crew won’t always be around. But can I really trust this guy?”
YUREI OKABE is climbing into his van.
SHINICHI TEMPEST INT. MONOLOGUE:
“But wait…”
FLASHBACK BEGIN
YUREI OKABE:
“You. Kid. What were you just running from?”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Oh, it was just a figment of my imagination. There’s nothi-“
YUREI OKABE:
“A ghost? Was it a ghost?”
FLASHBACK END
SHINICHI TEMPEST INT. MONOLOGUE:
“How else would he know about Chisaki?”
YUREI OKABE is staring at this kid wondering why he’s not moving and muttering to himself. It’s been a long time and he hasn’t moved at all. YUREI OKABE checks his smart watch and taps his foot impatiently.
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“O-okay.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST hops into the van and sees that it is filled with odd gadgets that he’s never seen before. He also notices a bag of candy in the car. He reaches for it.
YUREI OKABE:
“HEY! Not for you. Don’t get any funny ideas about me. That candy is for me.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“I guess that’s a good sign. Uh, where are we going?”
YUREI OKABE:
“Your place.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“How do you know where I live?”
YUREI OKABE:
“Not important. Aren’t you MORE curious about how I know about your little ghost problem?”
SHINICHI TEMPEST looks around as he says:
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Not really? More like, why?”
YUREI OKABE:
“Do you want my help or not?”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“With what?”
YUREI OKABE:
“Getting rid of your ghost.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“You can do that?”
YUREI OKABE:
“Yup!”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“And this is real?”
YUREI OKABE:
“Yuhuh.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Well, it’s not like there’s anyone else I can ask.”
YUREI OKABE:
“Of course there are, but program me flattered, anyway. Now, spill the deets on this ghost.”
CUT TO
VAN INT. – EVENING – EXT. – SHINICHI TEMPEST HOME (7)
YUREI OKABE and SHINICHI TEMPEST are in his van talking.
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Why me?”
YUREI OKABE:
“It’s regular folks like you that really attract spirits.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“My reputation precedes me.”
YUREI OKABE:
“But also you had a relationship with this spirit. It most likely wants revenge. So, obviously, we’ll need to use you as bait.”
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“As WHAT?!?”
YUREI OKABE:
“You’ll be the candy to my van! That uh- well if I WERE the type, uh- you know where I’m going with this. I mean-“
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“Okay. Stop. Tell me your name.”
YUREI OKABE:
“A little late for pleasantries, isn’t it?”
SHINICHI TEMPEST does not say anything or break his gaze from YUREI OKABE.
YUREI OKABE:
“Ugh fiiiine. I’m Yurei Okabe. Nice to meet you.”
YUREI OKABE reaches his hand out but SHINICHI TEMPEST does not accept it.
SHINICHI TEMPEST:
“No, thanks.”
YUREI OKABE:
“Fair enough. Well, get out of my van. We’ll talk more tomorrow.”
YUREI OKABE shoves SHINICHI TEMPEST out of the van and he falls over into the street. YUREI OKABE speeds off.
CUT TO
INT. LIZZY HOME – EVENING (8)
LIZZY LION is watching TV at her place. She gets a text from her Mom that reads: ‘How’s my big movie star?’ LIZZY LION responds with: ‘So good! It’s everything I had hoped it would be.’ She sighs dejectedly and tosses her phone aside.
-END OF EPISODE-